Sunday, September 21, 2014
HOW DO I LET PEOPLE KNOW THAT I AM INTERESTED IN KISSING THEM
last night i woke up because two dudes were fighting underneath my window and one dude kept screaming “BRO!! BRO YOU CALLED ME A BITCH IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE BAR BRO!! THE WHOLE BAR!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT BRO??” he sounded so heart broken. why bro. why did you do this.
Saturday, September 20, 2014
this is probably my favorite joke from futurama tbh
I love Futurama but I don’t get this what’s the joke
The joke is that a bunch of conspiracy theories say aliens came and taught Egypt how to build pyramids (because they are ‘too impossible’ for humans to have built’) and it’s actually the Egyptians that taught aliens and advanced their culture.
In Soviet Russia, kitten adopts YOU.
You can’t possibly say no to that.
"I HAVE SELECTED MY HUMAN. WE CAN NOW LEAVE THIS PLACE. HUMAN. SIGN THE REQUIRED PAPERWORK."
*lame nigga voice* i don’t get a hug?